Life in a box... rules part 1

1. Love with intention. I make sure in all things I do they are out of love and that it’s intentional, that it has a purpose behind it, that it provokes thought and meaning. This includes affection.

2. Apologize when you’re wrong. (not for who you are) I’ve read in places that apologies are weak. I completely disagree, yes you can be overly apologetic for no reason, but I was wrong - I’m gonna apologize.

3. Always respect others. I make every effort to be respectful to everyone. I respect their feelings, their privacy, their money, their time, their home, and their opinions. I teach my kids to do the same. In my house we don’t say disrespectful things, including “yeah.” This is a big one to me. I feel it’s important to be respectful of the big things as well as the small things.

4. Listen to people. I don’t engage in a lot of conversation but when I do I make sure I listen to what they say. This includes looking them in the eyes, not being distracted, and putting forth effort even if means you take notes. This goes along with respect.

5. Ask meaningful questions. It’s one thing to passively ask how someone’s day was. It’s another to ask what they struggled with, what brings them happiness or joy, what can I help you with today. It’s one thing to ask someone just to talk and another to ask them WHO they are as a person.

6. Help others. Sometimes it’s not enough to ask someone if you can help them. I like to be a doer, I like to just do things I see that need to be done vs. asking because 9/10 of people are stubborn and won’t want the help or won’t ask or agree. So, I just do what needs to be done without permission. Haha, it can come off as rude sometimes but I assure you it’s just because that’s who I am and I believe it’s important.

7. Self respect. I try very hard to be 1 step ahead of everyone. Most of the time I’m not even close. However, I’ve gotten more into respecting myself since my divorce. This includes not settling, being cautious in all my relationships with people, knowing that I live by rules and knowing most people won’t accept that or will make fun of me. I like to look good, smell good, dress nice, and give my all. I do that for me, to be close to the top of my game because I have to love myself first.

8. Think of the consequences. How are my choices today going to affect my future? This is a big one for me because I made a lot of mistakes in the past.

9. Watch your mouth. I’m a words person so I like to choose all of those things wisely. I want to make sure my legacy is one of wisdom and discernment.

10. What do they think? One of the last rules I live by is one of my most important ones. We are all different, we all have different values, emotions, and feelings. I’m a firm believer that most everyone deserves to have their opinion and rights to basic humanity respected. Unless it’s harmful to others, then people have the liberty to be themselves and have their feelings validated and heard. I don’t believe in demanding anyone to agree with me, but I prefer they listen to me, as I will listen to them. Instead of telling them they are wrong I prefer to have a conversation about the difference in opinion. I’m not always right and prefer to leave my opinions up for debate. But, respecting someone else for who they are and what the believe is essential.

Bonus: Always be prepared!