Life in a box... Sugar

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This is difficult to write.

About 12 years ago I went to the pound in Virginia. This sweet German Shepherd and lab mix pup about 2 years old or so was skinny and unloved. They put us in a room together and I’ll never forget how she just walked right up to me and put her head in my hand. Sugar had been abandoned by her previous owners and I was told she was bad with kids. I had 2 kids at the time and I tell you that was not even remotely true. From the first day we had sugar to the last she was the most loving, kind, and gentle (sometimes grumpy) dog we’ve had. She would sit there and be tortured by my kids pulling on her ears and mouth and tail, and she never once got upset.

Sugar was a lot like her daddy and enjoyed her space. She didn’t have many friends, and was a bit of a loner and maybe that’s why we got along so well. She hated men for the longest time and I was the only one she loved. She was great at listening and never really needed a leash. She hated rainstorms and would shiver and shake at the sound of thunder. She never slept in the bed or got on the couch when someone was home, but, when I was gone she would snuggle up in my bed or on the couch where I sat. Everyday I would come home and one of my damn shoes would be in a random place because she would carry it around all day. Haha

Sugar has been by my side through the hardest times of my life, she was there during the hardest parts of my marriage, my divorce, my stroke, losing my job, etc. no matter what, she was always happy to see me and she would get all excited and make this weird wimper noise when she was really excited to see me. She wasn’t a big snuggler but if she felt like being pet she would tell me by walking up to me and putting her head in my hands or barking at me.... God I’m gonna miss that.

Not many people have truly loved me in my life, but Sugar loved me like no one else has besides my kids (and Tera). But, she was the one. She has traveled across the country with me a couple times and moved from location to location. She was a such a huge part of my life, and on my loneliest nights she would always be there for me.

My kids are truly devastated as well, especially Riley. Riley loved sugar and took care of sugar with that huge heart she has. They were like best friends and they grew up together. They played in the snow, and they snuggled on the floor. It breaks my heart to see how painful this is for her. Riley and sugar have been together since she was about 3 and I don’t know how this will affect her moving forward but I do know they had a truly strong and powerful bond.

Our pup Tera was absolutely in love with Sugar and always wanted to play. On the days I would come home and let Tera out of her kennel Sugar would be so excited and try to open it up for me. Haha I wish I could explain to Tera that Sugar wasn’t coming home.

Life will be different moving forward for all of us that’s for sure. It’s definitely a blow to the family, I haven’t processed it fully yet but I know it will hit me soon.

This morning at 6:15 am on 11/10/20 I was giving her some love, then I gave her water, then 10 minutes later she collapsed from what they think was a stroke or brain aneurysm and she was gone, just like that. I scooped her up in my arms to take her to the vet, and she was limp. She was able to come back a little bit before we put her to sleep but she was brain dead and unable to move. She looked sad, hurting, and confused. I held my girls tight and they held me tight, we all cried, and then cried some more as we all said our final goodbyes. They are such loving kids!

I remember the way she looked at me last night before I laid down to cuddle with for a few minutes. She was extremely sad, and it’s like she knew what was going to happen, and honestly I think I did too.

Looking back I wished I’d walked her more, maybe snuggled her more, or maybe if I had just loved her for a little bit longer.